Tell me what you want what you really really want

I really really really wanna... 

 

What attracts your eye

I think the hardest thing about returning to work or looking for work is knowing what we really want, "what you really want'.  With confidence issues, self-doubt and skills that may need a bit of spit and polish it can be very hard to be honest to yourself and say “this is what I want’.  Lets face it you don’t want to disappoint yourself if it does not happen.

Yesterday on a course designed for people like myself returning to work in the TV industry there was no ‘how to’ or ‘this is how its done’ it simply help me work out and be honest with myself what I wanted to do 'next' and what employers would think I could do now.  Not long term but next and now.  

  

Yes next, more of a career audit then a step back, the trainer was amazing and very clear that careers should be seen in phases - what you do next doesn’t have to be forever.  There was so much more to it but this bit really changed me.

2011 on location

My industry has change, technology, systems, people retired, leave, have babies and I am starting again.  But this time not from scratch, after all, years of knowledge does not leave you. 

I have lots of hindsight, am very skilled, and have a strong track record.  So I’m great value for money for any employer if I apply for the correct roles. 

One step back is not a reflection on what I can do but a reflection on what a potential employer can see me doing now.  

 And as the saying goes one step back...

 

The other woman aka the nanny

Once you have decided to go back to work what do you do?  Return to what you did, try something new or take anything you can get?  

My little body guard

I'm sure its a combination of all the above but no matter what you decided there is one thing a mother must do before she can change her status from stay-at-home-mum to working professional. Entrust her beloved children to the other woman (or man), aka the nanny.
  
It might be a live in au pair, child-minder, nanny or even granny, but unless someone else looks after your little treasures you're not going to get very far from the home.  With no family in the UK and only one kid in school my husband and I decided a full time live in au pair was our only option.
 
Now it's one thing to say that you're ready to go back to work and trust the kids to another woman's care but the reality is very strange.  You are basically looking for a lady to move into your home, look after the kids, cook for them, help with school work, play with them, make them laugh and well, do all the things mummy does and then pay her for it.
 

Japanese lunch in Soho

Now there are some adjustments in head space and lifestyle that come with the other woman in your home and a lot come as a pleasant surprise.  It's the before kids freedom that I have gained, the last minute mid-week dinners out in London, if I'm running late it's ok, there is always milk and bread in the house and I get the best of both worlds, freedom and family.

And after all I'll always be mummy.

Fake it until you make it!

Putting the sparkle back in your eyes.  

 

I'm not a fan of blagging it, or fake it until you make it.  But confidence inspires confidence, well that is what I was told after a recent interview.

Confidence that little voice, knowledge of who you are and what you can do.  That thing for some random reason some of us mums lose it- lost it- can't find it.  It's seems with  every child you pushed out, some how a piece of your confidence to be a working professional went with it.

A couple of years ago I interviewed a lady for a corporate video and she hit the nail on the head.  In her very northern accent she said. “After I had my third baby, I knew I wanted to do something but I didn’t know what, I had lost confidence in me, confidence in being a business women, I don’t know why, I just had."

Dusting off the showreel

I didn't know why, I just had. It’s a mummy thing I think, not all mums lose it but those of us that did or do, need to get it back so we can sell ourselves, be ourselves and, well, just be nicer to be around.

So how do we get this lost confidence back?  

Get out your old CVs, showreels, artwork, references, photos or whatever you did or had for work and simply remind yourself... you did that, wrote it, shot it, researched it, typed it, dreamed it and one day you will do it all again.


And if you don't have confidence, "fake it" until you do! 

Zeitgeist, dreams and hopes.

With Grant Bowler on location... yes the guy from Ugly Betty

Why did I think having children would be the end of the line for working in broadcast?

 

I can’t answer that, I just did. After 13 years of working with presenters on location, spending hours in the cutting room, hanging contestants from helicopters, placing cameras in every possible place and interviewing and meeting dozens and dozens of contributors, I shifted into corporate and charity work. 

It felt like the zeitgeist had moved on from me.

I wish there was a fitting translation for the word zeitgeist. A moment in time when everything is brilliant, the coming together of all our hopes and dreams and then amplified beyond our hopes.

With no family in the UK my husband and I decided to hire a full time live in au pair to look after the children to give me the freedom to shoot overseas for a few weeks at a time, take a last minute role or stay late to finish an edit without feeling guilty or be stressed about leaving on time.  A great plan, but I just needed a job to pay for it!

Transportable skills

What do you do when you officially have not worked for a very long time?

First take a look at your skill set and apply them to being a mum.  Why?  Well they tell me skills are very transportable and it's more fun than looking for a real job!

1. Excellent time management. 

Kiddy dinner

Only a mum knows how 1 minute late for dinner can turn into a Dr Suess story gone wrong.

2. Working with on air talent, contributors and creatives.

Amazing training for a mum with toddlers and a five year old going on teenager.

 

3. Budgeting.

Easy when the wallet says "NO more" it means it's gone and it's baked beans for dinner.

4. Manage small and large teams.

Essential skill for anyone going to a playgroup.

 

What you find in my handbag

5. Experience with single camera crews and multi camera shoots, underwater filming, mounted cameras, working with stunt coordinators, government bodies, tourism offices. 

In reality it means I'm the mum who takes all the photos and videos at everyone's parties, books and finds party venues and arranges the girls' night out.

 6. Familiar with all production paper work, movement orders, call sheets extra.

 Training for the never ending piles of paper found in your kids nursery and school book bags.

7. Scripting half and full hour factual programmes and entertainment news.

Very important to be able to tell a story and feed the mummy grapevine that would put any tabloid to shame!

Turn back the calandar

I say I'm a stay at home mum, well kind of, it's not like I haven't worked in five years.

Over the past 5 years I have produced, directed and edited a number of corporate videos, retrained as a skincare consultant, tried my hand at fundraising and I now run a successful gift and craft market in Godalming.

With two children under 6 you might think I have my hands full.  Well "yes" is the answer but none of these other things have lit a spark when it comes to working.  Like most mums who want it all, we want to be there for our kids, work for ourselves and keep up to date with what is going on in the world.  SO we look for anything that may fill this void.

Here are my void fillers.

Temple Spa rewards for sales

1. My corporate video productions. They are great fun and I loved using all my skills, however I'm not a gun and business and hunting down new clients, I just want to be creative, write and edit nice stories and come up with killer ideas for new shows. And for me it's not the same as working in TV.

2. Temple Spa is a luxury skincare company and I fell into the role of consultant after producing a corporate video for them. I even tried my hand at managing a sales team.  It helped that I used the products for years and years and truly love them.  I was very good at it and made some great pocket money, working nights and around the kids. But again I'm no sales person and while its fun it's just, not me.

Godalming Independent Market

4. Godalming Independent Market
Long story short after a few local mums selling their works got together we decided to put on our own Christmas Market.  I put the payment on the hall and next thing you are all too busy to help, but would love a table at the market.

Borough Hall Godalming- Come inside

As a TV Producer I am skilled at 'Making it happen' so I did. But not just another market selling tat, a market I would want to shop at and one that did not charge me to get in.  I wanted all the stalls to make and sell lovely items not found on the High Street and a real discovery.

The next market will be on November 3rd.  You can see for yourself the stalls going to be there on facebook.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Godalming-Independent-Market/212940642098051?ref=hl

One of the free adds for the Fundraiser

4. Fundraising.  I must say The Team Hannah Health, Beauty and Fitness Fair was the biggest event I have put together on my own. It was fun, stressful and took a lot of time.  I met some lovely people, I worked my butt off and in the end it was a great experience.

A simple comment from the hubby has changed everything it was: "if you're going to work that hard you need to be paid for it". 

And so I started the journey.

Reality Bites

What happened to the blog

Well like all mums life just happen.
40 was a non event apart from a the most amazing night out with my hubby in Soho London.

Lots happened after that and it has sucked up all my time, so over the next few days I'll try to update you in how I went from stay at home mum to a woman with a mission to return to work. But for now here is that great 40th birthday gift from my Hubby the Marc Jacobs bag and a few other special gifts. As they say a picture ...